My Happiness Project - Month #3

I am very please with how my Happiness Project has been going.  I have come to realize that analyzing aspects of my life and ways to become happier has force me to evaluate what I am currently doing that prevents me from being happier.  


This month is going to be a hard month for me, but is much needed.

Month #3

September

Finances...aka "Going from Shopaholic to Save-aholic"

This is not one of my favorite topics.  

I hate to talk about money. 

Mostly because I don't have any, and also because it seems like I am always struggling to pay bills and keep my debt down. I have realized money (or lack there of) has caused alot of stress and sadness in my life.  If I learn to get my wallet and bank account under control I might begin to realize that there can be happiness without millions of dollars (or even $5). 

It is not like this isn't realistic.  

I just need to train myself to live the lifestyle I can afford 

instead of the lifestyle I think I can afford.

• Put myself on a strict budget
• Freezing the credit card (maybe even literally)
  
• Figure out a realistic payment plan for IOUs and Credit Cards
  
• Eliminate over-spending
• Find creative ways to be social without spending
  

August: Happiness Project Update

This month of the happiness project, my primary focus was to spend more time with friends.  It was the perfect month to try this because at the start of the month my days were pretty full with socializing with friends anyway.


  

This was me exploring Buzz Bakery in my
neighborhood with two college friends

There were good and bad things about this month's project.  The good was I was able to maximum my time with friends.  I learned that I need to listen more, and talk less. Too many times I get distracted by technology or my surroundings and I find myself drifting the focus away from the person I am with. After this month, I realized one the biggest changes I need to work on to become happier is focusing less on whats around me and what else is going on and more time focusing on the friend I am with. 

  NYC Trip with some of my college roommates 

turned out to be a weekend of
laughter, healing, sharing, and loving. 

The bad part of the month was a small hiccup I ran into with one of my close friends.  During a vulnerable moment on Saturday evening,  I let my guard down and told a close friend about my horrible relationship with B.  Only a very few people know about him and the horrible struggle I have had after our emotionally destructive relationship.  Unfortunately, my friend was not as understanding as I had hoped and did not take the story well.    I have always feared this would be people's reaction.  This fear is one reason I keep this secret buried deep inside. It would be a lie to say that his reaction didn't affect me.  I was crushed to see how he took the story and how quickly he threw anger back at me. The hardest part is knowing I can't take back what I said, I can't take back my past, and I can only hope that eventually this friend will understand me and the experience I went through.  


This month's Happiness Project forced me to think a lot about the friendships I currently have, how friendships are built, and how to keep a friendship. 


I realized at the end of this month that friendships are built upon a lot of things.  Trust, understanding, loving, honesty, and communication.  


I also learned a lot about myself as a friend to others.  I know now what I need to work on personally over the next few months (and years) on becoming a better friend to those who are special to me in my life.


Over the last three years I have learned a lot about forgiveness and accepting. I realized this month I am truly blessed with amazing friends, however, a part of me is still hurt by what happened with the one friend and I can only hope that I can change who I am, in becoming a better person, to show them the real me. 

My Happiness Project: Month #2

As you know, I have been working hard to keep up with my happiness project.  There is no better way to feel happy than on vacation with close family members, but for me, the month of August will be about making more time for friends and family and finding happiness through the people around me.

Month #2

August

Make Time for Friends (and family)

I chose August as my "Make Time for Friends" month because it is not only a slow month for me at work, but it is also my birthday month.  I want to utilize every day I can to make time to spend with family and friends this month.  After August work picks up again and I feel like spending an entire month to dedicate to my friends and family will be good for the soul. My goals for this month are:

• Remember Birthdays (Write down when I need to send cards to people)
  
• Be Generous
  
• Show Up
  
• Don't Gossip
• Spend more individual time with friends
• Give a friend more attention
• Send a care package to a friend or family member
  

Lunch Line

As you know, July is working on Health for the Happiness Project.  I have been trying to exchange out my daily sandwiches, chips and carbonated beverages for something a little bit more healthy.  I am really starting to enjoy the chicken salads I keep making myself and have discovered, apples, chicken and lettuce are a bit more enjoyable than my boring sandwiches from the past!

Try switching out your boring lunch for something a little bit more health and heart friendly.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away!

I am notorious for avoiding doctors. 


Its funny that I grew up in a family full of those in the medical profession, but something about me avoids going regularly to a doctor.  It had been a while since I had gotten a routine physical, blood work, urine test, or even seen the gyno, but since I am trying to stay on the path for the Happiness Project, I took the initiative of setting up doctors appointments today from the dentist, to the general practitioner,even stopping at the Gyno. 


Before I could even get my foot out the door today, I woke up with a shooting pain in my back.  My ugly annual kidney stone reared its head and decided to remind me that for the next few days I will suffer in pain until this passes.  Although I was having difficulty getting out of bed or even getting comfortable I tried suffering through all of my appointments until I could finally get a prescription at the end of the day.  I am "comfortable" now after popping a few pills and decided it was time to catch up on my blog, something that I have let go for a few months now.  


Seeking out medical help today reminded me that our health is a big part of feeling energized and happy.  I have been trying to eat healthier, drink less alcohol, and stay strict on the supplements that help get my body back in check.  July was a great month to focus on the health portion of my life and now all I need to do is kick my butt back to the gym...however, I might wait until AFTER this stone passes!


Nothing like straining your pee everytime you go :( 

The Happiness Project

This weekend at Barnes and Noble, I decided to try a book off of their recommended reading shelf.  To my surprise I kept finding myself going back to a book by Gretchen Rubin, entitled, The Happiness Project. 

Within the first 10 pages, I knew this was the perfect book for me during this time of my life.  If you haven't heard of it before, I recommend running to your nearest book store and picking up a copy.  She won't let you down.  No, I am not depressed, but yes, I am not as happy as I would like to be, and Gretchen, the author was in the same place when she wrote the book.  I haven't connected this much with a book in my entire life.

I have gone through many personal struggles within the last 3 years and after a weekend at home to clear my head, I realized I need to take charge of my life.  The best way to do it? By starting my own Happiness Project.   It will take the course of one year to finish the project, just like Gretchen outlines in the book. 

I have started a page in my blog dedicated to this project and will update it with my twelve commandments to follow along with, as well as a recap of each of the months, however, to follow along with my daily activities, I will be updating them in this blog. 

And so my personal Happiness Project begins:

Month #1

July

Health/Energy 

It is known to me, my friends and my family that the item in my life that I spend the least amount of time on is my health.  To start off on the right foot, I will work on my Health and Energy levels first. Follow along through my daily blogs on this. 

My goals for this month:

• Start working out
• Go to the doctor
• Revamp my meal plans
• Increase energy

I have already gotten a jump start on planning for July.  I just got off the phone with my doctor, gyno, and dentist and scheduled appointments for this month.  On top of that, I made myself a calendar just for workouts and have scheduled them in so that I have can erase any excuse from my book.  Just like Gretchen describes, I will go no more than two days without exercising.  Hopefully all of this will help to increase my energy level as well.   

And so begins my journey in finding the ultimate level of happiness..